Monday, December 14, 2015
Thursday, November 19, 2015
Both Wings
I see a lot of snarkasm being exchanged between my left wing friends and my right wing friends that has been provoked by the current Syrian refugee crisis and recent terrorist attacks in Paris, France. Americans are more politically polarized than ever before. We are truly divided and conquered. This is tragic because it literally and metaphorically requires both wings to get off the ground and take flight - this is both a pragmatic and philosophical truth. Constrained by locked horns of self righteous condemnation we are immobilized by our conflicting views and the ever present blame game.
I experienced a moment of self realization today while contemplating this. This polarization troubles me greatly, because I too often experience a conflicting duality that exists within myself. All these years, I have spent too much of my adult life feeling sorry for myself and being perpetually wounded over aspects of my childhood which resulted in a Pandora's box of personal issues such as PSTD, codependency, and a tremendous fear of abandonment. As I have worked through these issues little by little, I'm beginning to understand that these obstacles were a gift that forced me to expand my personal fortitude and world view that enabled me to adapt and survive. For with the burden of deep pain also came the gift of deep insight.
Looking back I can see an early example of this conflicting duality when I chose two very distinct and very different male role models as a teenager growing up in Sayreville, NJ. I had to pick wisely as my own parents were not present at that point in my life. Luckily I hit the jack pot.
One was my Scout master. A conservative ex marine, local factory worker, extremely tough, stern, no non sense, black belt, conservationist. A protypical man's man if you will, but one with a pure heart forged out of sincere religious faith and genuine human decency. I can recall one night that he intervened when he noticed that something was wrong with me and that my Mother's boyfriend had been beating me up. He escorted this man outside and shoved this guy up against a wall during a boy scout meeting. I felt protected and worthwhile by this. This man taught me about the practical nature of courage, integrity, respect for nature, and the practical skills, effort and action to keep yourself together in this sometimes harsh world.
The other man was my Theater teacher.. Quite liberal, kind, compassionate, fun, creative, imaginative, a pacifist vegetarian, but also extremely hard working, focused, and goal oriented. This man drove me to and from school for months so I could stay in school play even though I acted like a typical troubled teen jack ass well over half the time. He knew that my friends and activities were the only thing grounding me enough to even finish school and kind of keep it together. He taught me about charity, perseverance, open mindedness, vision, and the importance of following dreams.
Both men inspired me in equal ways, both men had great truths to impart. As I have journeyed through life I have relied upon the wisdom of both men. Each taught me how to use one wing. I fly better with both..
That right wing guy you are rolling your eyes at because of his fear based ideology and lack of humanity might be the first one to roll out of bed at 3 Am and pull you out of a house fire. That senseless hippy trippy idiot might be the person who actually stops and gives you a ride when your broken down on the side of the road. The good things we have in common is at least as important as that which sets us apart..
I experienced a moment of self realization today while contemplating this. This polarization troubles me greatly, because I too often experience a conflicting duality that exists within myself. All these years, I have spent too much of my adult life feeling sorry for myself and being perpetually wounded over aspects of my childhood which resulted in a Pandora's box of personal issues such as PSTD, codependency, and a tremendous fear of abandonment. As I have worked through these issues little by little, I'm beginning to understand that these obstacles were a gift that forced me to expand my personal fortitude and world view that enabled me to adapt and survive. For with the burden of deep pain also came the gift of deep insight.
Looking back I can see an early example of this conflicting duality when I chose two very distinct and very different male role models as a teenager growing up in Sayreville, NJ. I had to pick wisely as my own parents were not present at that point in my life. Luckily I hit the jack pot.
One was my Scout master. A conservative ex marine, local factory worker, extremely tough, stern, no non sense, black belt, conservationist. A protypical man's man if you will, but one with a pure heart forged out of sincere religious faith and genuine human decency. I can recall one night that he intervened when he noticed that something was wrong with me and that my Mother's boyfriend had been beating me up. He escorted this man outside and shoved this guy up against a wall during a boy scout meeting. I felt protected and worthwhile by this. This man taught me about the practical nature of courage, integrity, respect for nature, and the practical skills, effort and action to keep yourself together in this sometimes harsh world.
The other man was my Theater teacher.. Quite liberal, kind, compassionate, fun, creative, imaginative, a pacifist vegetarian, but also extremely hard working, focused, and goal oriented. This man drove me to and from school for months so I could stay in school play even though I acted like a typical troubled teen jack ass well over half the time. He knew that my friends and activities were the only thing grounding me enough to even finish school and kind of keep it together. He taught me about charity, perseverance, open mindedness, vision, and the importance of following dreams.
Both men inspired me in equal ways, both men had great truths to impart. As I have journeyed through life I have relied upon the wisdom of both men. Each taught me how to use one wing. I fly better with both..
That right wing guy you are rolling your eyes at because of his fear based ideology and lack of humanity might be the first one to roll out of bed at 3 Am and pull you out of a house fire. That senseless hippy trippy idiot might be the person who actually stops and gives you a ride when your broken down on the side of the road. The good things we have in common is at least as important as that which sets us apart..
Friday, October 30, 2015
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